There was this girl my senior year of high school. She was younger than me but we read each other's blogs and I gave her mix CDs. She got drunk a lot and generally seemed a lot sadder than everyone else. Like, I know everyone is sad, but this girl was sad in a more obvious way. It was a way that wasn't annoying, it was like almost beautiful. I remember this girl I worked with who I was friends with but would have never known if we hadn't worked together - she was telling me about this girl walking around all night at a party with ecstasy in her sweaty palm until she worked up the guts to take it and by then the colors from the pill had rubbed off all over her hand. But this girl came with us to the Taking Back Sunday show that spring and she was relatively quiet. I don't know if she liked the music in my car or the fact that Cassie always rode shotgun or the way that we left her in line when we were on the list or how she felt about all the kids from our school being at that show. She interrupted our rhythm but it was okay. I just remember on the drive home, she was sitting behind me with her window down as far as it would go and then her head was out the window. And it wasn't for just a second or like a look around, like I was driving 70 down the freeway leaving Seattle and she just stayed there hanging out the window. I think at first we sort of thought it was funny but the longer she stayed, the sadder it felt. I don't know why she was doing that or how it made her feel but that stayed with me. I think I identified with her right then. I just wonder how things are for her now.