it kind of hits you all at once and lately i just can't be left alone. i can't let all the bad things in at once because panicking in bathtubs and crying on the freeway and letting anxiety get the best of you at shows is not a fun road to continue down. it is hard to believe but i know it is unlikely every single thing will turn out worst case scenario. i can't be my old self but i need to just try to care about something. call it losing interest in things that used to make you feel good or call it growing up. all i'm asking is one step in any direction. this next phase of life is not a death sentence. this! is! not! an! end! no one likes a girl who won't sober up.